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Posted by Saniatamanna

Aunty ji I am a teenager. I am attracted to someone. I never met him nor I talked to him in social media. But I saw him in TV and other mobile apps such as YouTube etc. He is a famous personality and he is the same age. At first I saw him I felt little bit attracted but I ignored it. But slowly whenever I used to see him in tv or youtube some thoughts always occured in my mind. Because he was really handsome and attractive teenager. And also he was very talented and good in his studies. All these quality of him made me something attracted to him. And gradually he used to appear in my dreams and in some of my dreams I saw him becaming very friendly with me. And this made me more and more attracted to him. I used to make me normal like don't be crazy. It's just a dream. But all went in vain. And also I stopped the channel where he appears. But nothing can made me normal. That channel was useful and also I can't stop seeing that channel. And now I am addicted to him. Everytime his thoughts appear in my mind for example how can I meet him and how I can make him my Friend etc. What to do mam? Please tell me something that makes me normal

moderator love-matters

Saniatamanna puttar,
First of all yes, this is normal. Relax. It happens with everyone while growing up. You get infatuated with someone - it's all because of hormones! Rightly so, infatuation has been called ‘a shadow of love’. It has all the correct ingredients of being in love in the beginning, but while love tends to evolve and develop and mature, infatuation tends to fizzle out (trust me, it will some day). Infatuation can often be one-sided. You could have feelings for another person that they do not reciprocate at all. When infatuation first hits you, there is very little to differentiate it from love. However, there are certain signs — infatuation is about ‘me’ while love is about ‘we’. As mentioned earlier, infatuation is often one-sided.

The biggest sign is that there is the lack of any relationship. Just like in your case smiley

There are unreasonable and one-sided expectations set by you on yourselves and on another person, who is perhaps even unaware about your feelings. In y our case you feel like meeting him, making him your friend, talking to him - knowing very well that he does not even know about you smiley

So what can you do about it?

Talk to the person. I am sure he has some email id where you can reach him out? Or the comments section on YouTube? Let them know that you like them. If they reciprocate ask them out on a date, a virtual one or a real one! Depending on where you live.

If not, you have to back off. Slowly and steadily. Consider. it as your crush - who came and went by and gave you pleasant memories! Please understand that a relationship cannot be forced. And there is nothing more to be done. It may seem hard at first.

But put yourself in their shoes. Would you like to be forced by someone else to like them, love them, even if you didn’t reciprocate their feelings? Moving on and looking for someone who would reciprocate your feelings is the healthiest thing to do. Remember, relationships are fun only when both partners want it equally.

Do check this out! https://lovematters.in/en/love-and-relationships/meeting-someone/meeting...