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Relationships

Posted by Pushp.agr

Hello aunty ji. Mera naam Rishika Agrawal h. Mai ek ldke se 4 saal phle relationship me aai thi. Hm dono ek family function me mile the. Jb tk maine uska proposal accept ni kiya th tb tk to wo bht acche se bt krta th...meri hr bt ka dhyan bhi rkhta th pr mere usko accept krne ke bd se behaviour kaafi change ho gya th. Pr hmare 12th ke xams the to hm pdai me busy ho gye the. Xams ke bd hmne first tym sex kiya th. Mai studies ki wjh se out of town chli gyi thi jisse hmara connection almost tut gya th. Wo mujhe kbhi bhi koi call ya msg ni krta th. Uske bd 3 saal tk hmara koi contact ni rha. Beech me ek aad br uska msg aaya th. Pr wo bhi koi khaas ni. Maine is year June me fir se usse bt krna start kiya to shuru ke ek hfte to usne kaafi dhyan or tym diya mujhe. Pr uske bd uske msgs aane bnd ho gye. Mai jb khud se msg krti tb hi hmari bt ho pati thi. Mai agr 3-4 din usko msg na kru to wo khud se kbhi ni krta. Hm abhi kch din phle fir se mile the or sex bhi kiya. Mai usse apni studies ke liye bht dur jaa rii hu pr usko is bt se jaise koi farq hi ni pda. Sex krne ke bd se behaviour bht rude bhi ho gya h.

Mai usse bht zyada pyar krti hu or usse shadi bhi krna chahti hu pr wo is matter me koi interest ni dikhata. Wo mujhse khta to h ki he loves me pr uske actions me ye bt kbhi bhi ni dikhti.

Mai ye janna chahti hu ki ky wo mujhe cheat kr rha h. Ky mujhe use chor dena chahiye???

Please reply zaroor kijiyega. Mai bht zyada pareshan or confused hu.

Answer
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Nahi hamare ya kisi ke liye bhi keh pana mushqil hai ki woh kya karenge kya nahi. Lekin agar woh message karte bhi hain toh kya woh sthithi badal jayegi jo aapne sabse pehle likhi hai? Phir wahi silsila, message-mulakaat-sex-ignorance? kya aapko wahi ek pattern nazar nahi araha? Yeh pattern aapko kewal uljahaye-atkaaye rakhne ke allawa kuch aur kar raha hai? Kya ab bhi wahi chahti hain?

Ek rishta khatam karna kyun mushqil hota hai uske bare mein jawab toh hum de hee chuke hain uper-lekin agar khud ko ek is uljhan se nikal kar bhavishya mein ek sukoon, pyar, samman se bhare rishte ke bare mein sochna hai toh koshish kewal aapko karni hai.

https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/breaking-up/why-youre-h...

All the best!

Kiran Ki Rai.
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Aunti ji...mere liye bht mushkil ho rha h usko bhul paana...dil br br yhi kh rha h ki wo msg zaroor krega or mujhe is rishte ko khatm ni krna chayiye. Aap apne experience se btaiye na ki ky wo mujhe msg krega...or agr hn to mujhe kaise react krna chayiye???

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Dost haan jab partner ignore kar raha hain, toh dukh to hota hain aur iska karan jaane ka mann bhi bahut hota hain. lekin aap iska asli karan jaannne mein asmarth hongi dost.. kyunki kya aapke ex sach batayenge.. aur kya weh iske baaremein baat bhi karenge... Behtar hoga ki aap ye sab bhool kar aae badhiye, jo kuch bhi hua ye aapke wajah se to nahi hua.. unhone aapko ignore kiya aur konsa swabhimaani vyakti is kism ke ignorance ko apanyega? aap ne jo kiya hain woh sahi hain, unhe hi aapki kadar mehsus nahi hui... oopar diye hue uttaro ko bhi dubara padhiye. All the best.

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Aunty ji...mujhe overthinking ki ek bht bdi problem h. Mujhe apne ex ki ignorance ka reason ni pta. Mujhe koi bhi idea nii ki usne kisi or ldki ke liye mujhse duri bna li ya koi or bt h. Pr mai wjh janna chahti hu. Ky aap bta skti hn mujhe janna chayiye ki ni or agr hn...to fir kaise???

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Of Course, Dost, aapne itne din guzarein hain us person ke saath - itna kuch share keeya hai - to miss to aap zaroor kartee hongee.
Saath hee, Pusp.agr, ek kism ki aadat bhi ban jaat hai. Hai na?
Zaroori yeh hai ki is waqt aap apne aap ko ehmiyat dein, apne feelings ko aur is vishwasghaat ko samjhein - ki is kism ke rishte ya vyakti se kai zyada behtar haq hai aapka.
Aapne poocha tha, ki kya sex kar ke galtee ki . You know, jab hum sex ya sharirik rishta banatey hain, hum yeh thodi na sochtey hain ki yeh hume use karega, dhokha deyga ityadi - hum to pne poore dil se, pyaars e judetey hain - hain na? So bas, aapne bhi woh hee keeya - yeh person uske laayak na tha to bada loss kiska hua? Uska.
Bas ab apne aap ko sambhaliye, kuch naya puran keejiye - jo ki aap iske chakkar mein bhool gayee thee.
kehety hain ki ek aadat ko todne ke liye, kum se kum 21 days lagtey hee hain - so chaiye, shuru keejiye !!
Pyar aur Sneh ke saath, LM aur DB Team. https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/breaking-up/why-your-br...

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Hii aunty ji...kl se mai bht akela mehsoos kr rii hu...kisi bhi kaam me mn ni lg rha h...mere dosto ke paas bhi mujhse bt krne ke liye tym ni h...akelepan ki wjh se br br mujhe us ldke ki yd jti h...jisse mai or bhi zyada pareshan ho jti hu...plzz mujhe btaiye, mai kaise is problem se bhr niklu ???

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Kai baar hum logo par bharosa kar lete hain dost aisa hota hai koi baat nahi. Jahan tak sex ki baat hai toh galati ki hai ya nahi yeh kewal aap khud samjh sakti hain, koi aur nahi keh sakta aapke liye-sex kewal aapne nahi kiya unhone bhi toh kiya hai. Khairr In baton ko bhooliye. Aur is age mein sex kya hai, apne shareer ke bare mein, sex mein sehmati ke bare mein sahi aur zaruri jaankari hasil kijiye:
https://lovematters.in/hi/making-love
https://lovematters.in/hi

All the best!

Kiran Ki Rai.
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Bht bht shukriya Kiran ji...
Ek last question... uske sath physical relation bna kr...us pr trust krke koi glti kr di maine...???

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Dear Rishika,

Aapke andar jo asmanjas, confusion chal rahee hai woh hum samajh sakte hain. Asal mein apne sawal mein aap khud hee kai baton ka jawab de rahee hain ya keh lijiye aapko pata hai ki gadbad kahan hai. Soch kar dekhiye ki woh vyakti kewal aapse tab baat karta hai jab aap shurat karti hain, past mein bhi unka vyavhaar aapke prati bahut problematic raha hai jisemin tab bhi sudhaar ki koi gunjaish nahi dikh rahee jab aap unse door ho rahee hain. Itne ashatnoshjank/unsatisfactory rishte se aap kya umeed kar sakti hain?

Dost kewal isliye ki apne unke saath sex kiya hai aur ab isliye aapko kewal unke saath hee zindgi beetani hai, yeh soch itni sahi nahi-Sex toh unhone bhi kiya hai, pyar kar dawa bhi kar rahe hain phir unka yeh rawaiya kyun? Ek rishte mein sex ke allawa aapsi samman, pyar, companionship bhi zaruri hai. Jo is rishte mein nazar nahi aarahee.

Aapna dill mat dukhaiye, samjhdari se kaam lijiye, har baat par har pehlu se gaur kijiye, bhale hee khud ko samya dekar-ek antim nirnya lijiye jo aapke hit mein aapki bhalai aur khushi mein ho.

Aur abhi apko padhai, career mein bahut se mukaam dekhne hain, bahut se badlav, bahut se logo se mulakaat toh kai logon se rishte ke mamlon mein banna-bigadna bhi baaki hai. Aap samya ke saath khud ki pasand na pasand, aap kya chahti hain nahi chahti hain mein badlaav dekhengei isse hee evolve hona samya ke saath badhna-seekhna kehte hain.

Rahee baat unke cheat karne ki toh unka dhyan toh kabhi is rishte ki taraf thaa hee nahi! Ab in baton ko samjhte hauye apko apne liye khud ek sahi-thoss aur antim nirnya lena hai.

Yeh links bhi padhiye apko aage badhne mein bahut madd milegi:
https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/breaking-up/getting-ove...
https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships/breaking-up/how-to-brea...
https://lovematters.in/hi/love-and-relationships

Phir bhi kuch kehna chahti hon, baat karna chahti hon toh dobara likhiye, hum hamesha yahan hai aapke liye.

All the best!

Kiran Ki Rai.